My new plan

So when I want something done around the house or if i want my husband to clean up his mess he often says no that if it doesn’t bother him why should he do it. If the kitchen is a mess he will get to it when he wants or when it bothers him, not just go ahead and clean so that it is done.  I have decided (and I am NOT JOKING) that next time this bothers me I am going to take a crap in the garage.  Oh I will clean it up when it bothers me though. 

Smooth Talker

I have a friend, we will call her Dark and Twisty (D&W) and this is what happened to her today as she strolled through out towns downtown corridor. 

I was walking outside and went by a gaggle of hobos and I was wiping my phone on my shirt and one of them said “Sure wish I was that phone!”

Now I don't know how she contained herself from not dry humping one of those hunks of love but she must have some serious self control.  Really Asshole.... you are a bum and the most you can do is wish you were a phone to get rubbed on a hot girls shirt.  Try wishing for a job.